iPad Owners Are ‘Selfish Elites.’ Critics Are ‘Independent Geeks.’ Discuss. | Epicenter | Wired.com.
This post written on my iPad. You luddite.
Best Thing I Ever Ate
If you’re like me you cycle back-and-forth between National Geographic and The Food Network while watching television. I think it’s because I’m either subconsciously thinking about things becoming dinner or because I’m consciously thinking about things becoming dinner. The subject matter of each station is only a couple degrees different and separated by a tiny bit of evolution. It’s only a matter of time before NatGeo begins airing the wildlife equivalent of Top Chef but with more lions and less people crying. So the other night we happen to catch one of our more favorite shows, The Best Thing I Ever Ate. A funny thing about The Food Network is that no one ever plans on watching anything on The Food Network, it just happens. They have an entire advertising model based solely on channel flippers. So it just so happens that we happen to flip to The Best Thing I Ever Ate just in time to catch Bobby Flay talking about his favorite food. Now I’m not the biggest Booby Flay fan but I have to figure the man has tried a lot of food and is worth listening to, especially when he mentions that his favorite food is in Boston. It turns out that Booby Flay’s favorite “irresistible” food is a sticky bun from Flour Bakery in Boston. The show went on to document how the chef made the buns with their fresh rolled dough and tiny pieces of chopped pecan but she had us at “oozing goo” and we knew then that we had to make the trip in-town to try some of these for ourselves.
Behold…
Now here’s the surprising thing. While the Sticky Bun was good… and hot and fresh and oozing with goo, it was the macaroons that stole the show. So I highly recommend a trip into Flour Bakery but be sure to pick up a macaroon.
The Tiny Dictator
I call him the Tiny Dictator. Some people feel this conjures up negatives images of people such as Pol Pot, Stalin and Kim Jong-il. I say, they’re right. Yeah yeah, he’s not into all that genocide stuff and he doesn’t make us call him “Dear Leader” but I dare anyone to not give him a bottle when he’s hungry or pat his back when he’s gassy. Hell to pay. Purple-faced fury.
Never in my life have I had to answer to anyone with such comprehensiveness and urgency. I mean, we’re talking about a 12 pound being that doesn’t know where his hands are much less able to feed himself. Me, I’m a 200 (ish) pound adult that has an advanced degree and spends the majority of my time in stress-filled work situations, yet I am absolutely no match for the Tiny Dictator. The only explanation I have been able to come up with, at 3am and in a daze of sleeplessness, is that nature has intentionally built in a little known weakness into our species that simply cripples us when we hear our children cry. Just like a puppy’s knows it’s only natural defense is cuteness, a baby comes out of the womb knowing that it is in control of it’s parents. It’s like Kryptonyte for Superman and there is nothing we can do. It’s biology. Damnit.
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| From Baby Photos |
The saga of the missing cat
“Yeah thats not what I was looking for at all.”
One man’s effort to help a neighbor find her much loved and missing cat
Quotes from “Disorder in the American Courts”
This is from an email chain going around. I don’t usually post stuff like this but these responses are very funny (even if they they may not true)
————-
These are from a book called “Disorder in the American Courts”, and are
things people have actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by
court reporters who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually
taking place.
ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?
WITNESS: No, I just lie there.
____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
WITNESS: I forget.
ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you
forgot?
___________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo?
WITNESS: We both do.
ATTORNEY: Voodoo?
WITNESS: We do.
ATTORNEY: You do?
WITNESS: Yes, voodoo.
____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn’t it true that when a person dies in his
sleep, he doesn’t know about it until the next morning?
WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
____________________________________
ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he?
WITNESS: He’s twenty, much like your IQ.
___________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?
WITNESS: Are you shitting me?
_________________________________________
ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?
WITNESS: getting laid
____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: She had three children, right?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
WITNESS: None.
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
WITNESS: Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new
attorney?
____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
WITNESS: By death.
ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?
WITNESS: Take a guess.
____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard.
ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?
WITNESS: Unless the Circus was in town I’m going with male.
_____________________________________
ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition
notice which I sent to your attorney?
WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
______________________________________
ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on
dead people?
WITNESS: All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight.
_________________________________________
ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you
go to?
WITNESS: Oral.
_________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished.
____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
WITNESS: Are you qualified to ask that question?
______________________________________
And the best for last:
ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check
for a pulse?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you
began the autopsy?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive,
nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and
practicing law
Two Gentlemen of Lebowski
Where was this when I was in High School? This could be the single greatest Shakespearean play ever written. “‘Thou speakest rightly, sir. No man misdeals with Joshua Quince, by Jesu”
Tracing the Journey of a Single Bit
I great article from Wired Magazine. If you ever wanted to see where (and how) your data gets around this article is a great overview.
A Dodge Caliber to Remember
This Thanksgiving we decided that we would make the trek to Annapolis, MD to be with V’s parents. The whole family is descending on Annapolis so it is bound to be a Wii-filled, overeating, football watching, new baby cuddling good time. I also decided that it would be a good chance to look at some datacenters in the Virginia area because, well what’s a vacation without some quality datacenter tours? Reston, Virginia is home to AOL and at one time the datacenter capital of the world (AOL is to Northern Virginia as DEC is to Boston: It’s hard to go anywhere in Boston that doesn’t have some connection to DEC). So I will be looking at some old AOL places today and if all goes well I should be leaving with a trunk full of free AOL trial CD-ROMs…Christmas will be good to some of you!
Because V has to work it was decided that I would drive down to Annapolis on Monday and she would take the Acela to Baltimore. I could bring the dog and every piece of clothing we own and go rent a car as to not put any more miles on a leased Touareg. Luckily for us Avis still thinks I work at Yahoo! and gives me a generous corporate rate so that was a nice bonus. Avis was kind enough to give me a luxury Dodge Caliberwhich is, as they say, hot. The car kind of looks like something out the Transformer movie but I can’t imagine what it would transform into. Maybe a better car? Maybe an oven? Needless to say this was going to make my 441 miles, 6.58 hour trek special.
Well thanks to some heavy rain and miles and miles of stimulus roadwork the trip actually took 10 hours and felt like 700 miles but in that 10 hours I was able to make the following observations:
1) My Garmin Nuvi 360 GPS, while providing sub-par directions, proved to be a very good speakerphone when connected to my iPhone over Bluetooth. Who knew?
2) I think New Jersey is just messing with people when it comes to tolls. I mean c’mon?!?! Is there anything that expense on the stretch of road that it justifies that many tolls? Do people in NJ have to pay income tax?
3) Merritt Parkway to the Delaware Memorial Bridge all normal road rules are abandoned. This is no such thing as a left hand passing lane. The breakdown lane is just another lane. It’s a free-for-all and at times felt like I was in a Mad Max movie.
4) The Dodge Caliber proved to be a worthy vehicle. Yes, it’s bright orange and clearly designed by people that had never seen other cars but it worked and got me here. I wouldn’t buy one but I wouldn’t tell other people not to buy one.
5) Satellite radio was a HUGE bonus. A very nice and expected surprise that made the trip substantially better. That said Satellite radio is death for those of us with ADD and I must have changed the channels 300 times. In the end The Standup Comedy Channel, The Willie Nelson Channel, The Alternative Rock Channel and the Coffee House Rock Channel proved to be the winners.
5) The Playboy channel on Satellite radio is highly overrated. Yea, I know, what did I expect?
Now I’m off to collect those AOL CDs. I heard that traffic in the D.C. area is fun.
Friday
A roller coaster of a week is quickly wrapping up. In our last episode you may recall that my dog had what appeared to be a broken foot but what turned out, instead, to be Lyme disease. Not to be outdone by my sick dog, my 1997 Jeep decided it was a good time to rid itself of all bodily fluid. I was positive-based on my extensive career as an auto mechanic-that I had a cracked head casket but once I researched what a head gasket was on Wikipedia I realized that I had probably not done that. Nonetheless my Jeep was still light a couple of gallons of something so my attention turned to the radiator (again based on all my auto knowledge). Well I was wrong on the Lyme disease and I was wrong on the head gasket/radiator. My water pump was shot. It turns out that what started out as a miserable week was completely rectified by some doxycycline and a new water pump (dog and car, respectively). After two doses of doxycycline the pup has returned to his fully furry fury plus two days of pent up energy.
But just in case the week was looking dull we played host to relatives (not really but as close as you can get) from Denmark. Luckily they were/are very self-sufficeint and had no problem making their way around Boston and to a local grocery store where they stocked up on food to make us an authentic Danish dinner. It did not make me skinnier.
Stay tuned for the next episode where the car decides what will break next and planning for The Great November Ice Backpacking Trip gets into full swing.
Just like any other day
Today’s update: My dog was diagnosed with Lyme disease and my 1997 Jeep started draining itself of radiator fluid as I was pulling into the Vet’s office. Believe it or not this made my day better. I thought the dog had broken his leg and I was sure my car had a cracked head gasket (I don’t even know what a head gasket is). How’s that for a roller coaster of an afternoon?